Archive | March, 2015

Marriage, bed and me – habits of a wedded couple

19 Mar

The Dream

When you are single you dream of cuddles, snuggles and breakfast in bed. Something a little like this…

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But let me tell you my reality is very different and this post will explain that. I’m not suggesting this is how all married couples sleep but if you go to bed with snuggles every night I hate you!

The Reality

Nik and I rarely go to bed together – I would say 1 out of the 7 nights in a week we go to bed together.  I love sleep and if I’m tired at 9pm I will go to bed – I will never fight to stay awake. But Nik on the other hand is more than happy to stay up until 3am (on a school night!) playing Fifa!

Is it selfish that I like it this way?

I have a particular bed time routine that I like to stick too, this is not an OCD, no matter what Nik says. Part of this routine includes falling asleep by sunset to the sound of a thunderstorm. Thanks to my Lumie SAD lamp and my favourite app, Rain Rain. I also get to spread out in the star position if I like. It has been known my poor husband has had to had to get out of bed and move to the otherside in the middle of the night. Just last week I woke up to find him sleeping by my feet – top and tail style. What a lucky guy.

I am also a BIG fan of the Sudo cream facemask. If you don’t know what this is please let me explain. A little while ago I read in a magazine that Cheryl (Fernandez-Versini) did this as part of her skincare routine, I tried it once and I was hooked. Basically you get the famous bum cream and smoother your face, go to sleep and let in soak in overnight. This means you go to bed looking like this…

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TIP – You don’t need to go this thick – this was just for the purpose of the photo!

I am also a fan of an Elizabeth Arden overnight soak. Do you get the idea my skin care routine is lazy! This is also another sticky, overnight process; meaning late night passions are a big no no here!

So what does going to bed separately mean, if anything?

When we go to bed together it is really not that special, you do not have to have sex at bedtime and I’m usually annoyed that I don’t that have the whole bed to myself. So is our relationship doomed if we don’t have the perfect bedtime routine?

The perfect bedtime routine does not exist. At the beginning of a new relationship you attempt this… but it fails. Need I saw anymore https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbrG0VIFcD8

Sleep impacts your mood and wellbeing right, so why sacrifice it! Some couples sleep in separate rooms and if that’s what works for you fine, I don’t think it means your relationship is doomed.

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Has 50 Shades of Grey changed our sex lives?

16 Mar

Has the most talked about book and film in years really changed the way we talk about sex and upped the ante in the bedroom stakes? Hitched & Ditched give their opinion



Hitched says…

I have to admit I’m a little behind the times on the 50 Shades phenomenon, back in 2011 when the first of three books was published you couldn’t go a day without hearing about Mr Grey (and feels like we haven’t since!). The EL James novel smashed records and become the fastest selling book in history! It was everywhere. But I love reading and the reviews that slated the writing put me off, so I just carried on living my life. 

Then the film rights were secured, the cast announced and I felt a little behind the times. At the end of last year (2014) I read the first book. And what did I think? It was ok… yes the writing was a little wishy washy, but I’m a sucker for a love story. 

Did it change my life? No. 

The Film 

Six days after the UK release I went to watch the film with a group of 17 female colleagues. We were a mixed aged group, with mixed reviews of the film. I found the film to be pretty much the same as the book. It was a little cringe worthy with the lip biting scenes especially bad. 

Yes you got the usual book to film comments –with missed scenes and the characters not as you expected, but whilst reading your imagination creates the scenes and characters into your own personal movie. Your imagination uses your experiences and fantasises creating your own adaptation – it was always going to be hard for this hard to live up to your imagination. 

Some of the more negative reviews complained the movie was ‘tame’. But what did people expect? It is still a film – not a porno. When reading your imagination goes into overtime and what you read and felt could never be shown by Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan.

Many of my fellow film watchers rated the ending of the film pretty poor (don’t worry if you’re reading this and more behind the times than me, I promise I won’t ruin anything) but I thought the film ending was the perfect duff duff cliff-hanger. 

But I now have to see the sequel and am even considering reading the second and third book. For me it’s not about the sex scenes or even really about the love story – I just need to find out how the bloody story ends! 

Relationship Improvements

Ok I’ll admit 50 Shades of Grey didn’t rock my world – but the book has dramatically changed the relationships and the way we talk about sex.

These books have been known to save relationships – I mean that is pretty incredible. For some couples the books have turned into training manuals, acting out scenes in the bedroom have encourage them to fall back in love and lust. If reading these books get couples taking about what they want and shows the date nights don’t have to be boring that’s a good thing in my book (see what I did there!)

And 50 Shades has brought us more than improved sex lives – you can wash your clothes just like Mr Grey using 50 Shades of Surf, drink cocktails in Chiquitos and drink 50 Shades of wine… well they do say sex sells!  

Sam xxx




Ditched says….

As good old Ri-Ri once sang “sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me” so why is everyone getting their nipple clamps in a twist and jumping on the 50 Shades of Grey band wagon? (Uh oh, I fall in to that bracket with this blog post #guilty) 

It’s been a month since the film was released and gaggles of women flocked to the cinema with their gal pals to see if the most talked about erotic fiction book of recent times actually hit the spot. Now I have a small confession to make; even though I am quite a flirtatious and sexual being, I have not read a single page of the 50 Shades book and therefore haven’t gotten all frothy at the thought of the film.

I remember when the book was first released, but I just didn’t want to be one of those women clutching it like a copy of Cosmo and wanting people to give me attention; OHHHHHHHH look at her, bet her sex life is filthy if she reads that!  Nah, you’re alright love… I’ll stick to reading The Secret and trying to sort my life out with positive quotes about karma and the law of attraction.

Even though I haven’t read the book or seen the film, I am fully aware of what happens and some of the more graphic sexual encounters (or extra rude bits as mother would say) funnily enough my own mother has given me the three 50 Shades offerings, either because she’s worn them out or she senses it’s been a while and I need to get some excitement in my life…

So has 50 Shades changed the way we get it on and has it opened our minds as much as our legs? I’m unsure, I mean you’re either in to a bit of bondage or you’re not; I highly doubt flicking through a few pages of badly written erotica (lots of people have said it’s piss poor…) is going to have you flicking your bean over trying it for yourself.

Although I can imagine that some couples may try it out with pure comedic effect; you know those couples who have probably been together about 2 years, do the weekly shop at the exact same time each week, barely speak over dinner and are probably only together to save on rent… They may hot foot it to the local Cineworld and before you know it one of them is chained to a radiator being spanked with a copy of the Radio Times…

I’ve often thought about writing my own erotic fiction, but I think it would have more of a realistic element, probably featuring things that actually happen during sex, such as fanny farts, his piece popping out half way through, and what to do if he does an American Pie and gets excited way too soon.

I think that sex can be as fun or as routine as you want it to be, and we are all too easily swayed by what other people are doing. Do you really think that couple from work tie each other up with silk scarves every evening and have amazing orgasms at exactly the same time? Come on; or should that be cum on. Be as adventurous or as safe as you like, but you don’t have to rely on on a hyped up book or film to give your bedroom antics a boost.  

Kelly xxx



International Women’s Day: The women who have inspired Hitched

8 Mar

International Women’s Day is an opportunity for the world to celebrate women and their achievements. First held in 1909 in the United States – International Women’s Day is now celebrated in countries across the globe each year on March 8th. 

To celebrate ‘Hitched’ and ‘Ditched’ thought they would share the women that have inspired them – go girls!

My Mother 



Common known in my family as Marge / Ma – I’m not really sure why as her name is Viv; it started years ago and stuck. 

My Ma didn’t have it easy growing up – nowa days people often moan they are poor, but I doubt they would want to swap with my Mums childhood. She has had to work extremely hard to get where she is but never makes that apparent. 

My Mum started her training to become a nurse at 17 and to this day has put in over 40 years of service in the NHS! My Mum went back to work when both me and my sister were babies, fitting night shifts in between school runs and dummy tantrums and that’s pretty inspirational in its itself! 

My Mum is very kind and will help anyone out if they ask – but she is not a pushover. Although we don’t always see eye to eye my Mum is always there for my family. I’d like to think I’m the same. 

My Auntie Shirley 



I don’t ever attempt to hide it – Shirley is my favourite Auntie.  Fact. It has been commented on that our personalities are very similar (and we both love wine!)  

I always have and still do see Shirley as a super glamourous lady – no one makes Primark clothes look so good! Shirley radiates confidence and has a great attitude. A proper girly girl who loves clothes and make-up – who wouldn’t want her as an Auntie. 

Although I paint a pretty descriptive image Shirley is super strong and a few years ago got the dreaded C word. Cancer. But even after losing all her hair and being unimaginable ill, she fought it and won. Now we would be the first to raise a glass to that! 

My friend Natalie



They say “if a friendship lasts longer than 7 years, psychologist say it will last a lifetime” and we more than have that covered. 

Nat has been in my life since I was about 4 or 5. We have been there for each other through friends, boys and hangovers! A bridesmaid at my wedding she spent the day before running errands with me, whilst wrapping the wedding favours in pink ribbons in the back of the car. 

Nat has always been there for me and lately has had a bit of a rough time, but handled everything like a pro! She is easily the strongest girl I know! Nat become a Mum at the end of last year and 3 months in has handled it all exactly how I expected – brilliantly. I am incredible proud to have her as my friend.

I’m lucky enough to have had so many inspirational women in my life – it was tough only high lightening a select few but if I wrote about all the inspirational women in my life I would be here for weeks! Happy International Women’s Day girls!