Has the most talked about book and film in years really changed the way we talk about sex and upped the ante in the bedroom stakes? Hitched & Ditched give their opinion
I have to admit I’m a little behind the times on the 50 Shades phenomenon, back in 2011 when the first of three books was published you couldn’t go a day without hearing about Mr Grey (and feels like we haven’t since!). The EL James novel smashed records and become the fastest selling book in history! It was everywhere. But I love reading and the reviews that slated the writing put me off, so I just carried on living my life.
Then the film rights were secured, the cast announced and I felt a little behind the times. At the end of last year (2014) I read the first book. And what did I think? It was ok… yes the writing was a little wishy washy, but I’m a sucker for a love story.
Did it change my life? No.
Six days after the UK release I went to watch the film with a group of 17 female colleagues. We were a mixed aged group, with mixed reviews of the film. I found the film to be pretty much the same as the book. It was a little cringe worthy with the lip biting scenes especially bad.
Yes you got the usual book to film comments –with missed scenes and the characters not as you expected, but whilst reading your imagination creates the scenes and characters into your own personal movie. Your imagination uses your experiences and fantasises creating your own adaptation – it was always going to be hard for this hard to live up to your imagination.
Some of the more negative reviews complained the movie was ‘tame’. But what did people expect? It is still a film – not a porno. When reading your imagination goes into overtime and what you read and felt could never be shown by Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan.
Many of my fellow film watchers rated the ending of the film pretty poor (don’t worry if you’re reading this and more behind the times than me, I promise I won’t ruin anything) but I thought the film ending was the perfect duff duff cliff-hanger.
But I now have to see the sequel and am even considering reading the second and third book. For me it’s not about the sex scenes or even really about the love story – I just need to find out how the bloody story ends!
Ok I’ll admit 50 Shades of Grey didn’t rock my world – but the book has dramatically changed the relationships and the way we talk about sex.
These books have been known to save relationships – I mean that is pretty incredible. For some couples the books have turned into training manuals, acting out scenes in the bedroom have encourage them to fall back in love and lust. If reading these books get couples taking about what they want and shows the date nights don’t have to be boring that’s a good thing in my book (see what I did there!)
And 50 Shades has brought us more than improved sex lives – you can wash your clothes just like Mr Grey using 50 Shades of Surf, drink cocktails in Chiquitos and drink 50 Shades of wine… well they do say sex sells!
As good old Ri-Ri once sang “sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me” so why is everyone getting their nipple clamps in a twist and jumping on the 50 Shades of Grey band wagon? (Uh oh, I fall in to that bracket with this blog post #guilty)
It’s been a month since the film was released and gaggles of women flocked to the cinema with their gal pals to see if the most talked about erotic fiction book of recent times actually hit the spot. Now I have a small confession to make; even though I am quite a flirtatious and sexual being, I have not read a single page of the 50 Shades book and therefore haven’t gotten all frothy at the thought of the film.
I remember when the book was first released, but I just didn’t want to be one of those women clutching it like a copy of Cosmo and wanting people to give me attention; OHHHHHHHH look at her, bet her sex life is filthy if she reads that! Nah, you’re alright love… I’ll stick to reading The Secret and trying to sort my life out with positive quotes about karma and the law of attraction.
Even though I haven’t read the book or seen the film, I am fully aware of what happens and some of the more graphic sexual encounters (or extra rude bits as mother would say) funnily enough my own mother has given me the three 50 Shades offerings, either because she’s worn them out or she senses it’s been a while and I need to get some excitement in my life…
So has 50 Shades changed the way we get it on and has it opened our minds as much as our legs? I’m unsure, I mean you’re either in to a bit of bondage or you’re not; I highly doubt flicking through a few pages of badly written erotica (lots of people have said it’s piss poor…) is going to have you flicking your bean over trying it for yourself.
Although I can imagine that some couples may try it out with pure comedic effect; you know those couples who have probably been together about 2 years, do the weekly shop at the exact same time each week, barely speak over dinner and are probably only together to save on rent… They may hot foot it to the local Cineworld and before you know it one of them is chained to a radiator being spanked with a copy of the Radio Times…
I’ve often thought about writing my own erotic fiction, but I think it would have more of a realistic element, probably featuring things that actually happen during sex, such as fanny farts, his piece popping out half way through, and what to do if he does an American Pie and gets excited way too soon.
I think that sex can be as fun or as routine as you want it to be, and we are all too easily swayed by what other people are doing. Do you really think that couple from work tie each other up with silk scarves every evening and have amazing orgasms at exactly the same time? Come on; or should that be cum on. Be as adventurous or as safe as you like, but you don’t have to rely on on a hyped up book or film to give your bedroom antics a boost.